Another Year

Celebrated my birthday over the weekend. I use the word “celebrate” loosely since I don’t really like making a big fuss of my birthday. Who the heck am I? And what really did I accomplish in the past year? Seems rather indulgent. I just went out and had Russian food with my wife, which is a treat in my book. Later, I ended up having our drinks paid for by some famous Korean fashion photographer. It sounds pretty random, but sometimes random stuff happens to me, which is another treat in my book.

I actually can only recall having only one birthday party as a child. Now, I don’t mind. I really don’t like having all of that attention on me. But I guess ever since I was young, I was never fond of birthdays.

 

Worry Sex Children Japanese Shooter

Random thoughts:

It’s funny how what was an all-consuming thought last week is now almost a blip. Don’t get me wrong, I still worry about things and how the events from last Monday will affect me, but now I got other things in mind… trivial yet consumes me more. And isn’t that the biggest luxury of all? Being free to think and obsess over the trivial things?

Speaking of all consuming, Norm MacDonald is right. Men don’t think about sex every six seconds. They only do so once in a while. The problem is, the minute men think about sex, it’s all they could ever think about. It takes an orgasm to get them all sleepy and out of that funk. And no, I’m not saying I’m currently thinking about sex.

Met an old friend last week. I haven’t seen him for about eight years or so. He’s now got two kids. This got me looking at my other old friends. Most of them have kids now as well. Heck, one of my old roommates has three. I don’t know how a person could afford three kids in this economy. Anyway, sometimes I feel left out. Like I should be moving on and having kids at some point. Then I remember how unstable my life can be and how demanding children are. Glad none of my orgasms ever became people.

I just learned yesterday that a girl I know in Japan is a bit of a nut… a Japanese right wing nut. It’s one thing to honor the dead and respect a bit of your culture and history, but it’s another to honor the war criminals from World War II. I honestly don’t know how anyone in Japan can take politicians and people like these seriously. Look: there was a war. Japan was one of the bad guys. Maybe some soldiers did it for God and country. Maybe some were forced. But they were the bad guys and they did some pretty horrible things. Sure, the Japanese government has “apologized” many times, but they’ve also turned back on their apologies as well. And people still honor war criminals like they deserve it.

I guess the reason why the Japanese don’t get so villified and that they sometimes get a pass for flying the Rising Sun Flag is because the media hasn’t really made enemies of them as much as they did the Nazis. It’s why Japanese educators think they can just skip the horrors they did on history books because it’s not played on the media much. Look at the last few years. How many games have been made involved shooting Nazis? How many games have been made involved shooting Imperial Japanese?

And speaking of shooting. Korean men are required by law to serve two years in the military. One man went berzerk yesterday and gunned down twelve people. He must’ve really hated the place because he only had two months to go before he could resume civilian life. And to this day, they still cannot find him. There’s a popular reality show here about life in the military. It shows comoraderie and how Korean men are toughened up in the barracks. I never liked the show because it’s all boring machismo bullshit which inadvertently wanders off to the latent homosexual. Plus, it’s a reality show. I guess they glossed over the parts where they sometimes make soldiers go insane.

How’s that for a random thoughts?

What Have I Done Now?

 

Religious Rant Warning!

People have different religions, and even those of the same religion have different versions of the of the god they’re supposed to be worshipping. Muslims, Christians, and Jews all worship the same God. I’m a Roman Catholic, and there are two different versions of my personal savior, the Old Testament version and the New Testament. The New Testament is a Trinity as well, so there are three different versions of Him. I hope things get better for me though, cause lately, I feel like my personal savior is the Old Testament God… the vengeful and jealous version who tests his followers, makes dietary requirements, brings plague and pestilence, turns the curious into pillars of salt, banishes people from paradise, and takes away everything he has given.

Or maybe that’s just my Catholic guilt.

I wish I was raised more with the Christian God who loves unconditionally, the one who understands that we are human with human weaknesses, the one who loves the sinner, encourages us to turn the other cheek, and keeps us from hell.

But teaching me about that God was too much to ask for the headmasters in my old Catholic school. How else can you control a classroom with fifty kids? You scare them into obedience, that’s how. And now when things beyond my control go wrong, I usually think, “What have you done, Joe? This is somehow related to your failings. You’re an awful person.” as opposed to, “Don’t worry, Joe. It’ll be alright. You’re only human, and shit happens.”

I end up punishing myself mentally until I get ulcers.

Update: Less than ten minutes after this post, bad news hit me.

 

Things My Money Is Spent On

Shoes which absolutely don’t lift your butt.

 

Being “Poor” Despite Everything

Let’s talk about my friend, Greg.

Greg has a full-time job. Aside from the full-time job, he has two other jobs he does on the side. He tries not to say no to extra work, especially while he’s still young and the opportunity is there. Now, he’s not rich, but he earns more than your regular salary man… it’s enough that his boss thinks he’s overpaid. He earns enough to be able to support his wife, go out now and then, travel when needed, buy stuff that would keep him distracted, and help out family should they ever ask. He doesn’t spend much on himself. He eats two meals a day, rarely buys clothes, and keep everything he has until they’re too old to function (like his ancient computer or his old phone).

Now what does he not have? He doesn’t own a house. He wishes he could. He wishes he could invest in one, but the real estate market in South Korea is ridiculously expensive and people are highly dependent on debt. And he’s not about to borrow money from the bank. So he wastes money on rent. He doesn’t own a vehicle. He doesn’t care much for cars nor does he need one. He doesn’t have kids and doesn’t travel outside the city. Why bother with cars, gas, and parking? In many ways, he hasn’t really carved out a typical adult life with debt, mortgages, property, etc.

And so what do he get from all of this? He gets told that he’s poor.

His wife tells him that he is poor.

The comment was just said in passing. It wasn’t meant to be critical nor hurtful. It was just an observation mentioned in the middle of a conversation about something else entirely. Perhaps she meant “poorer,” who knows? Still, it didn’t make it sting any less. Blah, blah, blah… you are poor…. Blah, blah, blah, blah. It stuck out like a sore thumb.

It’s not that he has a problem being poor. Heck, he’s an artist and didn’t really have a rich upbringing. But it’s the fact that he works too hard, earns too high, spends too much, and buys too much stuff that he doesn’t need to be called “poor.” It’s like all the things he’s done doesn’t matter. That despite waking up early, resigning to a life of being a cog in a joyless company, despite sacrificing doing things he would really rather be doing, it all doesn’t matter.

He is poor. He is poor because his life does not compare to the neighbors’. He is poor because his life doesn’t compare to the ones on television.

And really, that is the rub. More than the personal hurt, the skewed perspective bothers him more. His wife has never been hungry. He’s never said no to the things she wants. He has supported her through her studies and continue to support her even after. But that one comment tells him it all doesn’t seem to matter. It’s not that he’s fully content with his life right now. Sure, things could be better. He’s got ambitions too. Like the average human being, he wants the house with the backyard, the car, the mortgage, and everything. Someday, maybe. But there is no true poverty in his life at the moment. He’s seen true poverty. This is not it. If anything, it is selfish affluence and indulgence that have skewed what true poverty really is… the luxury of being offended by poverty. Greg’s wife thinks that he is poor. Greg is hurt at the idea of being called “poor.” You know what the poor are probably hurt about? Actually being poor.

In any case, he doesn’t deserve to be called poor, not after he’s tried everything in his power to give whatever his wife wanted.

It is one thing to be looked down upon by others. He kinda deals with that everyday, especially being a foreigner here in South Korea. He’s gotten used to it. But it’s another to be looked down upon by people you care about the most… even if it was just a comment in passing.

We all get carried away with things. I believe that that comment was just his wife getting carried away. Greg doesn’t need to work three jobs. He just needed one. He works too much that he barely has enough time to do what he truly wants to do: make art. But it’s all the stuff we don’t need, it’s doing the things we don’t really have to do, it’s comparing ourselves to others and competing in this endless Facebook wealth one-upmanship- it’s eventually what consumes his life and makes him and the rest of us miserable.